farewells aren't ever happy.. it's not easy to see someone go off, somewhere else.. whether temporary or permanent. even in our everyday conversational byes, there is that small fraction of a chance that a twist in timing may mean a permanent adieu, for good. i used to think whoever called goodbye, goodbye was just plain ignorant. but perhaps there is some good in it.
all my life, in these (few) years.. deaths were painful goodbyes. from losing g (who'd ever thought life ended at 18? esp when one was only 9) and then watch teri slip away just like that one year later. hospitals aren't pleasant either and i never got to show k my psle results. flooding regrets when it came to kp (at the end of the day you can blame noone but yourself). losing a friend is just about as painful as family, realised that through e. and losing your bestest companion is the worse of all. it's been almost a year and i daresay i've kinda recovered from it. wounds heal, scars fade. and well, it's yet another goodbye.
maybe i've grown up, learnt from mistakes.. walked away with no regrets this time. sadness is inevitable but i guess there's less pain in not watching the losing battle and being told that there's an end to suffering.
i'll always miss, love and remember you. cos you've been part of my 21 years.
perhaps you'd be proud to know, i can wake up on my own right now. if only you knew.
tears dry, emotions fade.
life goes on.
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