if days like these always follow after happy days then i'd rather not have a happy day. i'd rather have mundane and non-special days so that life will be normal. well, relatively at least.
i'm sorry for dao-ing. for ignoring. today was the day in a long time that i just said it out straight.
i'm tired of that facade.
i'd rather be a deaf-mute. no need to hear comments. no need to reply. or would i regret that.
i'm regretting a whole lot now. when reality strikes you hard, that's when you really fly. and that's when you see who really catches you.
i dont get why it's just sinking in now. i hit this periodically and it just fades.
but maybe what i said in facades was right. that maybe every layer forms till you don't know what's truly beneath.
compositions fill in now and then, but i havent been completing them. they're just left there hanging.. maybe till i get my next inspiration. just keep thinking forming and writing but what is a true piece of work till it's completed?
i'm waiting. waiting in high hopes to know if i've succeeded.
but deep down i fear the drop. i fear dashed dreams.
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