just let me be me, no questions asked.

all i need is a good disguise
one where nobody can recognize
that i'm feeling so small

if only this could just be a song. a story. a fictitious event. something that you can wake up and walk away from. the hardest thing to fake, is happiness when you're tearing apart inside. shredding from end to end and yet plastering a smile, just to fool the people who see the sorrow weighing down your eyes, the people who care. the more smiles you force out, the easier if becomes. but there's a huge price to pay: you're merely deepening the wound within, making it harder to heal.

Journey

Corrinne May

It's a long, long journey
'Til I know where I'm supposed to be
It's a long, long journey
And I don't know if I can believe
When shadows fall and block my eyes
I am lost and know that I must hide
It's a long, long journey
'Til I find my way home to you

Many days I've spent
Drifting on through empty shores
Wondering what's my purpose
 Wondering how to make me strong
I know I will falter, I know I will cry
 I know you'll be standing by my side
It's a long, long journey
And I need to be close to you

Sometimes it seems no one understands
I don't even know why I do the things I do
When pride builds me up 'til I can't see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through?

'Cause it's a long, long journey
'Til I feel that I am worth the price you paid for me on calvary
Beneath those stormy skies
When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes
It feels like everything is out to make me lose control
It's a long, long journey
'Til I find my way home to you

they never said this journey would be so hard. i guess it's like any other, an unknown road in darkness, you trip horribly and sustain a huge gash but look at your buddy and smile just so you guys can carry on to reach the end. every step is agony but you're holding back the raindrop-sized tears, secretly hoping a storm is brewing just so you can cry in the rain and noone will know. you know the storm will sting the open wound, but it'll wash it clean, wash away the pain. and one day, you will heal, look back and laugh, perhaps cry over it, but give a big genuine smile knowing that it was merely a thing of the past.  

oh hurry, reach the end please.